Weight Of The World

Things were good. ... key word "were".

I don't know. I feel like I have so much piled on me. Stressin for like no reason I guess.

The emails to my bro are bothering me. Cant let it go. Thats been on my shoulders for awhile now. But more just added to it.
My mom's been flippin on me lately which again, adds to it.
Kerri, my 'best friend' has been asking me when Im gonna do pot again; if ever. I told her I didnt take a break from it. I 'quit'. Therefore not going back. And she wouldnt leav e it at that. She continued on and we like pretty much argued about it. This isn't the first time it's happened. She asks me often. It bothers me cuz I feel like she's pressuring me back to it. I dunno. I wish she'd support me more instead. Unfortunately, it seems that eversince I quit, her and I haven't been as close. I'd hate to see drugs ruin such a good friendship. It shouldn't be that way.
I don't know. Maybe I'm taking everyting overboard. I just feel so AHHH!! ... stressed?
I get so worked up, so easily. Im like always on edge. I've been suffering from major headaches day after day now and I like constantly feel sick. I dont know if all of this ties together or what. But I hate it.
I wont lie. I've still been happy. This just kinda affects it. I cant be as happy as I normally would. I still have my Pierre here and I dont want this to affect us. I dont want him to think Im mad at him or that he's done something. Cuz he hasn't. Not at all. Nothing has changed between him and I. Things are still good. He's been soooo supportive through everything. Even if he doesn't know what's going on. He's always there. He cares so much. I love him to death! ....... But this kinda affects us. Just cuz of me. Me getting worked up so easily. Being on edge. All of it. I dont want it to affect us. Bah!
Well I hope him and I can find a way out to Belle River on Friday cuz I would love to get out. It'd probably be good for me. I'd like to. Cuz when I'm out there, everything is so different. I feel so free. It's so peaceful. I'm so uppity. So it'd be good for me to go. To get out of here. Away from all this.

Anyways. Thats enough.