:: Which Of Us Do You Love? ::

Well, today was an overall, good day. I was so tired though. That's all I ever am anymore. The pills make me yawn like crazy and I always seem tired. I took a powernap today though, after that I've been fine. Really good mood and not tired. The thing I hate though, is I have a hell of a time sleeping anymore. I don't know if it's cuz I have so much shit going on in my head, that it interferes with my sleeping or what. I woke up at like 7ish (4 hrs after I went to bed) and tossed and turned afterwards. I had a hell of a time sleeping!!

Well, here's some things, in order, from today.

• Woke up
• Showered
• Went up town with mom and grandma
• Handed out a resume (woo fun)
  
• Watched my mom get her hair cut =\
• Babysat for about half an hour
• Chatted online for a bit
• Ate supper
• Texted Matt a bit (asking about Emily)
• Took a nap
• Chatted online/Watched tv
• Talked to Eric a bit - finally!
• Been online since then
• Heading to bed soon

What a fun day, huh? Yeah, full of a bunch of nothing!! Well, on a somewhat good note, I don't babysit for the rest of the week. So I got the whole week to myself. Which is good but bad. lol Not like I do anything anyways. All I'll be doing is cleaning up the house with my mom, getting ready for Christmas stuff. I can't believe Christmas is like right around the corner. It's fricken crazy! I don't know where the year's gone! It's insane!!! I'm slightly excited though. I love Christmas. Only cuz it's so full of happiness, family, singing...etc. Things like that. Such a warm feeling that comes with that holiday. I've always loved Christmas for the family reason, but now I don't see family cuz our family practically split apart. We don't get along. So it kinda sucks. But it's still good. Main reason I like Christmas this year, is for the Christmas carols. hehe - I looove singing. But it sucks though. I miss being in choir. I miss being in the concerts around the holidays. Performing, Christmas Caroling...etc. Things like that. It really sucks. Man, is there negative to EVERYTHING?! .... Sucks ass! Oh well. lol I'll make my own damn choir! Just me, myself and I! hehe - I think I've gone a bit far on that one.

Anyways.... Things are alright. Sammy helped me out and got rid of my upset'ness earlier. So I'm feeling a bit better now. (I just wish I could've helped her out a bit more. I feel bad. She's always helping me. I hate seeing her like this, but I did what I could. I hope I helped atleast a bit. Hope she feels better soon too!) Well, what was bothering me doesn't seem to bother me as much anymore, but I still have my times. I'm sure I will for awhile too. We'll see.

I thought a lot about Emily today. It really sucks. I miss her, alot. Whether she existed or not. I decided to put her back in my msn name cuz even though I don't know if she truly existed, she still has a place in my heart, and mind. She was a big part of my life no matter what. I just wish I could have some closure; figure it out!! It's bothered me since the day I got the news that she passed. Losing three people in one and a half years, isn't easy!!!

Well, on a happier side of things, I stayed in a decent mood majority of the day. Yes, that's a good thing. I'm so hyped, crazy n wild now a days. And you know what? I Looove It! =) Nobody can stoppp me!! hehehee - lol Im much more outgoing than I used to be. It's good. I missed this side of me. Let's just hope it stays.

Well, I'm running out of things to say. This is much longer than I expected to. Damn me and my writing! So I shall be going for now. I will return though. Always do. Ain't you a lucky little blog! =P

Goodnight everyone. <3